Monday, September 21, 2009

Treading Water

I am debating with myself about publishing this. I guess I will throw all my thoughts onto the computer screen and see what sticks. In many ways I am just treading water. Financially, mentally, physically. I have just enough strength to keep it together; not sink. I know you guys are used to coming here for a laugh, but I started this blog as a place I could shout and vent about how I am feeling. Frankly I don't care who reads it. Hi Mom, hi Gran.

For the last few months we have had Murphy of Murphy's Law fame living at our house. I think he has inflated the air mattress in the spare bedroom. Right now I am thinking of ways to evict him, but for now, apparently he is staying. Maybe we are banking all the bad luck now for good luck come the New Year?

The latest round of Murphy has found us once again in a financial crunch, but in these economic times, and on a military salary...when are we not in a financial crunch? We have done this song and dance before. It is just draining. Moving just wasn't in the plan. Now it is the plan, since we have no choice in the matter. Of course with moving comes extra expenses. Once again, weren't planning on them. I am not asking anyone for money, or putting up a donation button, because #1 I am too proud for for that. #2. We'll make it. It will be tight for a few months, but we'll make it.

I will say.... you learn some interesting things when you get put into a spot like this. Like, laugh at the little things. My new house. It has a name. It is called Old Rising Sun. So...I am literally going to be living at The House of the Rising Sun. So, yes that does mean we have found a new house.

Also, you have to be very patient. When your nerves are already in shreds then the kids start their crap (oh come off it you all know what I mean), and then dinner needs to be cooked and you are still on the phone with one more important phone call. Patience. Not my strong point. I am getting better tho.

Prayer. I know not everyone believes in prayer. It helps me though. Want to know why it helps me? I believe in God (let's just get that out there(it is actually in my profile section but nobody ever really reads those)) and even it I wasn't a believer, just voicing all my frustrations and getting them all out IN WORDS helps. Writing helps to, but actually saying it out loud to God, helps. Mentally it has helped immensely. Here is my advise, even if you don't believe in God, just sit quietly and SPEAK all of your frustrations. It helps.

So that is where I am folks. Treading water, but keeping my head above it. I am not in a perfect place but I am still above water; kicking and screaming. You know what that means? I am still alive. I am still fighting.

40 comments:

Yaya said...

I know what you mean. We are the same way. Just barely scraping by with bills. Hope you can get above water soon!

boots said...

when Murphy has come to town there aint nothing you can do but hold on. Money surprises never go away either but you may want to stop talking about treading water cause it could give Mr. Murph ideas.
I found a journal I kept when our boys were 1 and 2 till they were 9 or 10...sweetest, funniest, most honest words ever read. These days are their history, their memories. Put as much down on "paper" as you can cause honestly, you will be so proud to share the struggles of their life time with them~ and note: this too shall pass. Note 2:I believe in God as well, and needed to be reminded who I should be talking to..thx

Amy@Bitchin'WivesClub said...

Sorry to hear it, Kat. But glad that the blog and prayers are keeping you sane and put together while things sort out. (It is, indeed, incredibly expensive over here and my husband and I are just starting to get a handle on what our monthly expenses will be. I'd be more scared about it if I wasn't so damn excited to not have $1000 in medical ins/costs a month over here.)

If you want to talk, just call or skype. *big hug*

Mrs OMG Pregnant said...

I hear you!

I think its been the same for us for a few months and hope we're just about turning the corner. We've had more than our fair share of bad luck BUT the last few weeks have been good, we're trying to see silver linings with the whole 'house being sold twice but now we're back to square one with hundreds of pounds wasted' scenario.

Hoping it all sorts itself out for you. xxx

ps. I'm also a military wife (to-be), it's hard sometimes!

Irish Gumbo said...

I wondered who that was bobbing in the water just a few hundred yards away fro me :)

wishing you and the fam love, peace and strength, my dear. I know what you mean about voicing things out loud...I know...

Badass Geek said...

As long as you're keeping a roof over your heads, clothes on your backs, and food on the table, everything else will happen as it may.

Keep treading. It'll get better, eventually.

mo.stoneskin said...

I'm glad you've found a house, and I understand, we're going through the moving process too and boy does it sap those funds!

Aunt Juicebox said...

It's been a rough year all around, I think. I for one will be glad when it's over. I know you'll hang in there, you make it seem like an art form sometimes. :)

Vodka Logic said...

I am glad you found a home. Vent away we are all here to read and comiserate an support.
xx

Mango Girl said...

Vent away! To God, to us bloggy folks...to whomever. Just vent instead of keeping it all bottled up inside.

I think many of us can commiserate with you...I just hate the fact that it is such for our military families. That should be illegal.

Many hugs and prayers to you...
xo, Mango

Chasity said...

When we hit times like these, I make it a point to remind myself of our blessings. You've found a new home, that's a great start and a huge blessing.

And the times when just counting my blessings isn't enough, my mom usually steps in to remind me that dishes will still be there tomorrow and pb&j will practically make its self and those are the little things so don't stress over them (yada yada yada). She usually has a point, though.

I'm keeping you in my prayers, and hoping your stress is brief and your move goes as smoothly as possible for you & your family.

Mwa said...

You are so right. Alive and fighting. Hang in there.

I think you're right about the force of prayer. I'm not too sure what I think of God, but getting your problems out there, clearly, to look at from a little distance, is a very good thing to do.

Keep fighting!

Jess said...

Boy that Murphy guy...SUCKS! I am thinking about ya. Keep your head up and punch Murphy in the throat! Keep praying, it does help to speak to the big listening ear in the sky!

I just try not to think about money...you know, like how I have like a total of $5 in my bank account at any given time! :) LOL! But I DO like to think about how it is almost winter, which means cheaper heating/air costs, which is part of what is putting us all under!

Love ya! XOXO!

And when you move in, I want to see your YouTube video of House of the Rising Sun, while you are IN the House of the Rising Sun!

CatLadyLarew said...

Keep on treadin'

The Good Cook said...

Aren't we all just treading water? Whether it is financial worries, health problem or marriage woes, there is always something.

Happiness is fleeting. Hold on to what you can. Let go of what you don't need. You are right, speaking to your higher power always helps.

Like my dad always said, "If someone told you life was easy (or fair) they were a god damned liar"

Hang in there. This too shall pass.

A Modern Mother said...

Look on the bright side -- more blog fodder...

Jenny said...

I'm sorry to hear about what's going on right now. Really glad that you found a new house though, I'm sure at least that part is a relief. And it's your blog, you should never have to wonder if you should or should not write something. Sometimes you feel like you are the only one going through stuff, tough times, whatever, and it's comforting to find out that there are lots of us out there with similar stories.

I hope you get all the details worked out soon, and you can get moved and settled before the holidays and new year.

Catharine Withenay said...

I've moved house 7 times in the last 6 years: it's not fun, it's not cheap, it's not uplifting. It is draining on emotions, body and finances. But (and there is always a but!) being moved and settled is great. And having God's company on the way makes it all worthwhile.
Best wishes.

LisaUnfiltered said...

I'll be praying for you too!

Jen said...

I am sorry that you are feeling overwhelmed right now. But I think that you have the right attitude. You will get there. It might not be quick but you will be in the good times once again.

Captain Dumbass said...

Murphy is currently planning on breaking all my shit at once.

SPEAKING FROM THE CRIB said...

we're all feeling the crunch! at least we know we're not in this alone, right? best of luck!

Petra a.k.a The Wise (*Young*) Mommy said...

Honey, I am so right there with you. We are in the final months of five years living with my in-laws, have no money and two crazy kids and I am working my ass off from home and sometimes feel like I am losing my mind and just won't make it! but at the end of the day, we will all make it, and there are brighter times around the corner, I just know it!

Hang in there!

Sprite's Keeper said...

When Murphy comes to our house, I just wanna charge him rent. (And he never picks up after himself.) We often find ourselves in the same spot and that's when our convictions are strongest. Just keep swimming through the tide and holding your head up. When it comes to sink or swim, you'll never drown. You're in my prayers, Kat!

Wendy said...

Sending love and strength ♥

notfromaroundhere said...

I hope it's just s(*&^y for the reasons I already know about and not for yet more things...

did I ever mention the one dog I've ever had was named Murphy? He's on my blog:
http://notfromaroundhere.wordpress.com/2009/02/13/puppies/

Miss Grace said...

Murphey needs to get the hell out of there.

Hugs lady.

Jenni said...

i hope your new house brings you lots of luck and lots of laughs. keep treading.

A Mom on Spin said...

Look at you! You've already got like 28 best friends ahead of me!

Ditto to all they say!

Maureen@IslandRoar said...

I agree with Liz; What's to add?
My own good thoughts heading to you. Been where you are and you feel pummeled. It will get better. Hang in.

Moonspun said...

Treading water does mean that you are still alive, although water is splashing in your mouth and you are getting shitty tasting gulpfuls....
Sorry things are tough. But so love the name of your new house...that's just plain cool.

BeautifulWreck said...

I can relate to this. Hope it turns around soon.

Auntie A said...

Okay Katie, (yes, I said Katie only two people can get away with calling her that, me and her Papa) chin up you will get through this saga again and have plenty of tales to tell in the process. I will trade my Murphy anytime....why am I always the first one people find when there is a bathroom problem at the office? I must have a sign that says ask me I'll clean up the S--T all over the floor and in the trash can...for Pete's sake PLEASE take my Murphy away. My, it sounds like a lovely day had by your dear ole Auntie A doesn't it? Well I hope this at least made you laugh...I will tell you the whole story on the telephone.
xoxoxo
PS- I pray all the time, He is such a great listener.
PSS- blog friends I work in a doctors office...ugh!

Bee and Rose said...

Murphy is the worst houseguest ever...we can't get him to leave our house either...boooo....

Sending you lots of prayers! I admire your strength! I know you will stop treading and start swimming soon!

{{{hugs!}}}

Mom in High Heels said...

Oh sweetie, I'm sorry you're having such a rough time. I know exactly how you feel though and as you well know, this too shall pass. I can't wait to see photos of the House of the Rising Sun. Think of all the blogging you'll get out of this! Take care and keep treading. You'll get above water soon. (((HUGS)))

American in Britain said...

OMG, Kat, we are like living double lives. I understand completely how you feel. I've been running around doing the same thing.

We've found a house (actually, we found several houses but our first two choices rejected us - one because of finance, the other because we came in second) but we don't want to hand over a deposit until I'm sure of my actual starting date at work. In the meantime, we could lose the house.

I don't know about Oct. 23, but if all goes well, my first paycheck will be Oct. 24. Can't wait for that.

Randa said...

My heart goes out to you. I understand the feeling. A serious family illness has me out of town every other week which in turn keeps me from working (family ALWAYS before career) so hubs and I are being creative with his salary to say the least. We'll make it too...as will you. Isn't prayer incredible!?!

for a different kind of girl said...

Oh, hun, I know it's stressful, but if it helps, do please know that so many others are in the same boat with you and we're all working hard to keep it afloat. I'll definitely be adding your family to my prayers, because I am definitely in the same boat with you again on that business!

Princess Andy said...

maybe it's the time of year, but you certainly aren't alone:)

the awesomeness of the internet is that you can always find support and kindness.

or at least around here you can;)

hang in there, vent when you need to, and count to ten!

andrea

p.s. also, a glass of wine couldn't hurt either.

honeywine said...

Blogs are made for ranting. Heck, if I didn't rant, I'd have nothing to blog about. :) As for Murphy, let's put out a hit on him. I'm sick of his butt.