Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Dear So and So about So What and So Forth...

Dear KiKi,

Yes, it's that time again. A lovely note from your mom. Now, I know you are contractually obligated and at a stage in your development as a human where you are supposed to be ornery, petulant, and generally a pain in my rear end. You're two. It happens. But seriously, can we knock it off? At bedtime, when you tell me "Mommy out!" I know it isn't because you are wanting to be self sufficient and go to bed on your own. It is because the minute I walk out the door you are going to get out of bed and start doing whatever the hell you want to do. I mean, you aren't even being slick about it; you turn the lights on. From now on, lay down, go to sleep and hush your mouth, cause frankly I don't care if you pitch a fit, you are still going to sleep.

Also, quit hitting your sister. She is a sensitive kid and will totally take it upon herself to rat you out. It would be in your best interest to start picking on kids who are A) much bigger than you or B) can't talk and therefore can't tattle on you.

Love, Mom
------------------------

Dear Interrupter-One Upper-Close Talker,

I now know the heights of all 3 of your children. This isn't because I took a measurements of my own, it is because you say stuff like "Well my oldest, you know the 5 foot tall one, she yadda yadda yadda yadda" Couldn't care lady. Also could you back up just a smidgen when you are making a point to me, because, well, you're in my bubble and I might have to take evasive defensive actions if you get any closer.

Regards, Kat
-----------------------------

Dear LaLa,

You. Crack. Me. Up.



Thanks for the laughs, Kiddo.

Love, Mom

31 comments:

AirmanMom said...

Kat...Awesome post! I miss those days!
Make it a good day!
~AM

BiblioMom said...

I LOVE the style. There is a little girl in a classroom that I consult in who has her own personal style a lot like your lala. It always makes me smile and I'm so happy the parents let her just be herself.

Great post this morning. Now I need to find a Bloody Mary!

The Stiletto Mom said...

Seriously, all three of those annoying habits combined is like a Seinfeld episode!

Loving La La's fashion...girlfriend will be rocking the runway at some point!

Cat said...

Oh wow, she's gorgeous! Look at those pink legs! She's the next Stacey London. Awesome.

Sometimes, I worry I'm a one-upper, but don't realize it. I always have to analyze conversations that just occurred to determine if I talked too much.
No wonder people steer clear of me.

Badass Geek said...

A one-upper AND a close-talker?

GAH.

Michele said...

LaLa's fashion sense is great!

Sprite's Keeper said...

I had to go back to look at the outfit. I don't get it, what's wrong with her style? I like it! Go KiKi!

Joanie said...

I see LaLa has the same fashion sense as Ruthii over at Vodka Mom's blog! Good for you, LaLa! You're no slave to fashion!

bessieviola said...

This kills me. I cannot believe that she turns the lights on after you leave...

Seriously shaking with laughter. Can't wait for these antics to show up in my house!

Chairman Bill said...

My ex won't allow me to put pics of the kids on the blog for fear of paedophiles being around every corner. God save us from over-protective and over competitive mothers.

honeywine said...

Cindy Lauper convention? lol I wish I could get away with that outfit! I HATE people who get too close. You can back up and they still don't get it!

for a different kind of girl said...

The lady clarifies the subject of her yakking by their height?@ That is both awesome and odd.

Your kids, though, are 100 percent awesome!

Mama Dawg said...

What's wrong that that outfit? Except for the fact that I'm wearing a solid blue shirt, I'm wearing the SAME EXACT THING! Tell Lala she ROCKS!

A Lawyer Mom's Musings said...

The one-uppers are everywhere these days. Too busy bragging to relax and enjoy. Oh well. Their loss.

Keep up the good humor.

Comedy Goddess said...

She may have taken that runway look from Jean Paul Gaultier. Seriously!

Shonda Little said...

Great Post. Your daughter was definitely rocking that outfit and I totally know what you mean about the hitting 2 year olds. I live with one too.

Captain Dumbass said...

You know when she gets older and becomes a designer she's just going to use all this stuff against you.

Tismee2 said...

This is a great post Kat, I wish I could come up with smart arse comments like that at the right time.

My Jordan thinks he can sneak things past me - but as I was the 'princess of sneak' at his age I catch him every time.

bet you're the same.

Petra a.k.a The Wise (*Young*) Mommy said...

Lala is adorable, I love it when my little one dresses up!

Not so much do I love when she asserts her two-ness though!

Yaya said...

Hahahahaha!


Oh the terrible two's (which is really ages 1-3....) yeah, I've dealt with too many of those while nannying! At least I get to leave them at the end of each day!

Jen said...

loving the letters and that photo is awesome.

steenky bee said...

Is it sad that I have those exact same pants?

I'm from Utah. Space is abundant here. In my world, "close face talkers" are people that stand within six feet of me.

Cameron said...

When does the contract expire? Seriously, my 2 year old boy and 3.5 year old girl are both working their ornery mojo real good.

Bee and Rose said...

LaLa is a fashionista! Any girl who can rock a tutu and some black boots has a future in the world of fashion to be sure!

Kiki...well, now...my six year old pulls the same stuff! I love that your daughter just boldly turns on the lights and gets her party on! lol!

One-uppers and close talkers drive me batty!!! UGH!

Kim Hightower said...

LaLa is just fab! Love her outfit!

Lola said...

Oh, the close talkers!!! My blood pressure went up just reading about it.

Love the outfit, though.

Vodka Mom said...

i LOVE THAT!!

Get her ass over here- I've got a best friend for her.....

Jenni said...

two sucks. that is all.

Cape Cod Gal said...

Interrupter-One Upper-Close Talker......I work with her husband!

colepack said...

cute letters

Mom101 said...

You're right - she and my daughter definitely need a playdate. Preferably at Barney's. With a personal shopper.