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Monday, January 24, 2011

Ill Fated Coffee Run

I had two things on my to do list this morning that really needed to be completed. The first order of business was coffee. I needed caffeine this morning and there was a disturbing lack of it at my house this morning. Monday mornings need caffeine. That is a rule. Dammit. The second order of business was I needed to get my car washed and detailed on the inside because, well, kids are gross and the inside of my car will testify to that. Easy peasy, I can get this done.

First stop- the car wash on base. I removed my radio antenna, put the $7 into the machine, pulled my car into the car wash and waited for it to work it's magic. Only, it didn't. Why isn't that machine working?!?! Was there a button I was supposed to push? Oh yeah...So I walk back to the machine that took my money outside the car wash and press the button and RUN FOR DEAR LIFE to get back into my car before the spiny washy things start to wash my car. Barely. Made. It. Back. To. My. Car before the machine started. This was my first mistake of the morning and why I should have made my first stop Starbucks. After the machine stops and my car is gleaming on the outside, I pulled out of the car wash and put my radio antenna back on, cranked the tunes and headed to the Starbucks on base.

Second stop- Starbucks. Venti skinny mocha no whip cream. Thank you very much. Mmmmm delicious. Caffeine in system. I only drink half of it because I know I will be standing outside while my car is getting detailed at the next stop.

Third stop (and this is where things start to go really pear shaped)- car detailing place located on gigantic roundabout called the 5-ways (always has really hot Turkish lads working). So, I pull in pay my £10 to have the inside of my car vacuumed, the trim wiped and polished, and OH DEAR LORD I FORGOT THEY USE BABY POWDER SMELLING AIR FRESHENER.

(For those of you who don't know, I hate the smell of baby powder. Actually I have a physical reaction to it. It makes me hurl. Logic? Baby powder reminds me of baby bum, poo comes out of baby bums, gag. So, the smell of baby powder in my head smells of poo. They may as well have rubbed baby poo all over the inside of my car and been done with it.)

Now, I have to drive home in a baby powder smelling car. My worst nightmare come to life. It might only be 5 degrees C outside but all four windows are down on my car on the way home. I am trying not to spew my Venti skinny mocha no whip cream on the freshly vacuumed floor boards and oh hey lookie there a police officer just pulled behind me so there is no chance of speeding home. I had to drive 30 mph for 10 minutes before the police officer finally turned, meanwhile I am about 10 shade of green and considering hanging my head out of the drivers side window like a dog to avoid the smell in my car. I get out of the 30mph zone and hit the 50mph zone that goes to my house. I floor it. I could not get home fast enough. I pulled into my driveways and barely got the car into park before I jumped out of the car and took a deep long breath of non baby powder smelling air. For the record I didn't spew.

Lesson learned? Watching hot Turkish guys vacuum out the inside of the car is not worth the drive home. From now on, I will quit being lazy and vacuum out the inside of car myself.


unmitigated me said...

Had you done Starbucks first, there would have been enough caffeine in your system to remember about the Turkish baby powder issue. Always do coffee first.

Sueann said...

Ha!!! Yes Starbucks first and couldn't you tell them no scent please? Or is it in the cleaning products? Cause good looking guys cleaning the car sounds hot for sure! And who wants to miss out on that!?

Unknown said...

Well, that was quite the morning. Now me, I love the smell of baby powder but I think if I were you, I'd definitely tell them no scent next time... just saying.

Jess said...

This I did not know! Glad I do! I do not have an aversion to that particular smell, but I also do not have any kids...sooooooooo...

Hey at least you got Starbucks and your car clean.

Unknown said...

Has the same effect on me too - I never used the stuff on either of my boys, in fact just thinking about it is making me a little queasy. No association with poo - I just don't like it - just as I detest the smell of Horlicks and driving past a brewery (Barf!)

Joanie said...

Thanks for the reminder. My car needs detailing badly! And I have no one to blame but me.