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Friday, July 10, 2009

Dear So and So....Just Call Me Ms. Gripes A Lot

Dear The Man,

Honey, sweetie, babe, wonderful husband, I know there were at least 6-7 revolutions of TP around the toilet paper roll left last night before I went to bed. I made sure. It was calculated planning on my part. So this morning when I went to the little girls room, I was expecting at least a little TP left. None. Zero. Zilch. Nada. I had to do the shakey shakey drip dry dance over the toilet. Gah. Yes, I know it is my fault that there is no TP left in the house, but I tried to plan it out.

Grumble, Kat
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Dear Kids,

All unattended chocolate is fair game. Just sayin'.

Love, Mom
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Dear Up Close Talker Lady,

Here is a quick and handy guide to Kat lexicon. If I say "maybe" it most likely means no. If I say "I know", it means "I know, but I probably won't do anything about it". Ask my Gran; she'll inform you of the full verbiage I use to avoid confrontation.

I Don't Want to Come to Your Pampered Chef Party,
Kat
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Dear Lady With the Barbie Pink Car,

My kids love your car and covet it. Hell, I covet it a bit. It is the purple skull and crossbones on the gas tank that got me.

Where did you get your paint job,
Kat

PS- I tried in vain to covertly get a picture of your car in the Sainsbury's parking lot. Next time could you park on the drivers side?
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Dear Hay Fever,

Go away. You are not welcome here.

Bah!,
Kat
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Dear Readers,

If you would like to participate in Dear So and So grab the button in my side bar, give it a whirl and leave your link here with Mr. Linky. It really is that simple.

TTFN, Kat





31 comments:

Anonymous said...

I can't stand being invited to all those "parties". I'm like, how come you never wanted to hang out with me before but now that you are throwing a party where you can get free stuff if I come you suddenly wanna be my friend?

♥ Braja said...

I. AM. COMMENTING.

Woot!!!!


Well hell, it's been 3 weeks.....

Chairman Bill said...

What exactly is Mr Linky? I'm averse to entering stuff in the spaces provided without full explanations. Might get spammed.

Irish Gumbo said...

Ms. Gripes A Lot? Does that come in an "action figure" playset?

Unknown said...

The T paper bandit strikes again; hate when that happens. Don't like to be invited to those parties, or any other of that kind, either.

mo.stoneskin said...

"All unattended chocolate is fair game."

So that's the rule? Dammit, why didn't they teach me that at school?

Anonymous said...

So with you on the unattended chocolate!

Michele said...

At my house all chocolate unattended or otherwise was fair game. I was only looking out for their future dental issues.

Kitten said...

I'm with you and Yaya on the "parties." The worst is when the consultant tries to aggressively recruit you. I had this one Pampered Chef lady who was on my case for over a year. I just ignored her, and she went away.

I wish all consultants were like that!

Badass Geek said...

Close talkers.

*Shudder*

Bobby G said...

i AM A TOILET PAPER HOG! the worst! lol

Liz Wilkey (a.k.a. A Mom on Spin) said...

I am so WITH you on the tp thing!

Sprite's Keeper said...

Skull and crossbones on a pink Barbie car? I think I may be in love. With the car, of course.

Expat No. 3699 said...

Did your husband respond with:

"All unattended toilet paper is fair game"?

Captain Dumbass said...

You should get the same paint job on the Jeep, just don't tell The Man. Oh, and get a Hello Kitty skull and crossbones.

Unknown said...

Ugh I loathe pampered chef!!!!

Michelloui said...

Noooo! I hate that moment of realisation AFTER THE FACT that the TP is gone!

I pretend all chocolate in the house is off limits to me in order to keep from eating it. I had a weird childhood.

Ive had enough of the hard sell parties. ENOUGH.

Barbie Pink car! Woo hoo! I just saw a union jack ford Ka which was pretty groovy (baby).

Hay fever. Bleh.

Dawn Parsons Smith said...

Maybe means NO to me too:)

A pink Barbie car with skull and bones! AWESOME!

I completely agree with you about the chocolate!

Rebecka said...

Ditto on the chocolate. Unless it belongs to me, in which case it better still be there when I come back.
No Pampered Chef, no candle parties, no Mary Kaye, no parties at all in which I am EXPECTED to buy something.

Lisa said...

ALL CHOCOLATE IS FAIR GAME.... attended or otherwise... ;)

Maureen at IslandRoar said...

I love this!
Seriously, a skull and crossbones???
And DUH! OF Course All Chocolate is Fair Game!

Kimberly Wright said...

Mine is up. Mister Linky was acting freaky!

Liz Wilkey (a.k.a. A Mom on Spin) said...

I'm back! And I'm in!!!!

Joanie said...

I used to be a Tupperware lady. Now I avoid home parties like the plague!

Sam said...

You can never plan on how long toilet paper is going to last when guys are in the house. By my calculations, we should have enough to last us 3 weeks. Ten bucks says it's all gone by tomorrow night.

Amber said...

I am IN!

SO with you on the chocolate. Big thumbs up!

Momo Fali said...

Unattended chocolate doesn't last a second around here either.

Toni said...

Unattended chocolate? Nope none of that in the house - it all went :-P

Grace said...

Hi Kat, it is my first time here and I am happy to have found your blog. I just enjoyed reading your post. :)

for a different kind of girl said...

Seriously about that unattended chocolate business! My youngest son STILL hasn't touched his solid chocolate rabbit from Easter and I'm getting antsy!

Jenni said...

you've gotta get a picture of that car.